friday night is stripper night

we all went out last night to get loaded up and see strippers.

when i say “we”, i mean mamaluna + papaluna, xz + danger, and hmc and me.

when i say “loaded up”, i mean drink some drinks with the fire water inside. strange concoctions with sake and vodka and disclaimer amounts of fruit juices just to satisfy usrda requirements.

when i say strippers, i mean strippers.

how much better is seeing strippers with three girls than seeing strippers without three girls? THREE TIMES AS BETTER, of course.

why? well, bucko, sidle on up here and i’ll tell ya why:

more bang for your buck: sure, you can sit in the front row and throw out dollar after dollar onto the stage as if you were a change machine at the laundromat, and maybe you’ll get a little wiggle waggle, or maybe even a “hello, how do you do?” jiggle. but if you’re a girl and we throw a couple of bucks down in front of you, man you’ll get the treatment royale. you’ll get the rub up, the rub down, the double backside triple flip, and then some! why? because you’re a cute girl surrounded by two other cute girls, which reads fun and nice! not some lonely guy sitting next to some other lonely guy, which reads creepy at best and CREE-PEE at worst. i can guarantee that you’ll never get the stripper to stick her head underneath your skirt and BLOW ON YOUR KITTY. and that’s what happened to danger. yee-haw.

i could go into details, but after a while, it all just blurs into a big jiggly mess, right? let it be said that we got lap dances for all the girls, and all the girls were happy.

i think this was originally supposed to be a birthday stripper visit, but if it’s not in the same month as my birthday i tend to forget, so in my head it ended up being a “buy all the girls their first lap dance” visit.

so it was written, so it shall be done.

Posted at June 11, 2005 10:49 AM