matrix ressurected?

(i don’t think there are any spoilers in here, but if you’re worried…)

ok, so i just got back from watching the final matrix installment, and i have to say that it’s not as bad as i expected. which is to say, my expectations were so incredibly low, given the general brief review snippets i allowed myself as well as passing comments from people who had seen it already, that it didn’t out and out and out suck. ok, granted, the plot didn’t necessarily make much sense. and the dialogue was clunky and even embarrassing at times. and nothing was exactly surprising (although that was party because i had a major plot point spoiled for me by dumb people at work who went to our preview screening for customers and then talked about it at the dinner later, dumbasses).

but, you know, the effects were good, the ending was at least not totally bogus, and to be honest, i’m ok with it. at least there wasn’t some dancing ewok party at the end. or some part where later neo becomes governor of california.

other thoughts:
1. monica bellucci has an incredible rack.
2. ok, it’s one thing to watch a nipple pinching scene in a major motion picture, but it’s another to watch it on an IMAX screen, where the nipple is as large as your whole body. yowza.
3. speaking of which, i like that the new yorker review has the sentence:
American men enjoy violent entertainments, and an aureole of religious or speculative mystification surrounding the violence doesn’t take a dime away from the box-office.
4. did anyone else get a tron MCP flashback?
5. <geek>speaking of which, all i could think about when they went to the machine city, was, “but if linux takes over the world, then wouldn’t it be all distributed, and not in a big city? or is big computing iron really the answer?”</geek> apparently i’ve been drinking too much linux kool-aid from hanging out at oracle all the time.
6. anthony noted the similarity between neo’s vision of the real world and what it looks like when frodo wears the ring in lord of the rings. perhaps there should be a crossover, neo: the one…ring?
7. was that actually chairman mao laying in the puddle at the end?
8. finally, was that pentultimate ultimate battle really worthy of a pentultimate ultimate battle? a final fight to end all fights? how does it compare to some other final fights:
-jackie chan vs lau kar-leung in drunken master 2
-jet li in the legend of fong sai yuk
-donnie yen & yu rong guang vs. yee kwan yan in iron monkey
-chow yun fat in that hospital shootout in hard boiled
-superman vs. general zod in superman 2
-hell, the chateau scene from matrix reloaded or even neo vs. agent smith in the original matrix
the quibble is that after all the kung fu buildup, all the action scenes are really shootouts, and very little kung fu in the finale. which is a little disappointing.

i guess the telltale sign was that, even on opening weekend, in a sold out house in the IMAX theatre, full of matrix fans all dressed up and decked in their finest latex, the crowd was entirely quiet during the whole movie, and there was barely a smattering of applause afterwards. not unlike watching the premiere of spawn: the movie in l.a. those years back, where all the fans were in shock at how bad it actually was and didn’t know what to do, despite the fact that todd macfarland was in the theatre. oh well.